Fun With Pirates
by Sarah1281
Summary: In which Zevran must infiltrate a pirate ship in order to kill his current target and is seduced by his target's gorgeous wife. A lot. Maybe there was something to this whole piracy thing after all...


Pirate Zevran

Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Age.

Note: The prompt was Zevran and pirates. I had no ideas so eventually I came up with this.

Tonight was the night the Rivaini captain of the ship the Siren was going to die. Zevran wasn't particularly fond of the paranoid Captain Omer which certainly made killing him easier than if the reverse was true. When Zevran had first been contracted to kill Omer he had thought it would be an easy enough job. He had been mistaken. Omer was, as he'd mentioned, an extremely paranoid man. Zevran couldn't quite say that he was overly paranoid because there was, in fact, at least one assassin aboard Omer's very vessel with orders to kill him.

It had been a month since Zevran had first joined the crew of the Siren and he had to admit that while he had certainly not expected the job to go like this, he couldn't really complain. When he was a young child he had often dreamed of escaping first from the brothel and then from the Crows on a pirate ship. He could get an earring and a ponytail and go off and find the Dalish. Well, he had got an earring, at least, although the Dalish had spectacularly failed to live up to his expectations and he felt that he looked ridiculous with a ponytail.

Joining the Siren's crew had actually not been his first idea or, indeed, his idea at all. He had initially been trying to get close to Omer – and failing, tragically, as the pirate captain was far more well guarded than he had any right to be – when he had come across the captain's gorgeous young wife, Isabela. She seemed to have no great affection for 'the greasy bastard' as she referred to her husband and she had quickly fallen into bed with him. She had, to his slight surprise, proven very smart if almost desperately bored. She hadn't known he was a Crow but she had come up with the idea to add him to the Siren's crew anyway so that they could continue their tryst and Zevran could – as far as she knew – get passage to the other side of Antiva.

Zevran hadn't been sure about the plan as it he knew little about pirates and wasn't sure if he could impersonate the kind of person a pirate would recruit skillfully enough to be allowed to join the crew but he needn't have worried. Isabella had been doing this for a few years and had easily coached him on how to approach her husband (with far too many guards to make his move, unfortunately), how to make his case, and how to be a convincing recruit. He had wondered vaguely whether she had done it before but it was no matter.

Once aboard the Siren, Omer's security was much lighter. After all, it wasn't like a threat could come in from the outside. He had two guards to protect him on the off chance that one of his pirates – such as, say, Zevran – were to decide to attack him and Zevran had made sure to drug the wine that they had drank at dinner. It wouldn't kill them but it had made them both violently ill so that there would be no one protecting the dear Captain. He supposed that he could have struck earlier but Omer refused to be awakened before noon and they were coming in to port far earlier than that in the morning so if things went as they should then he should be long gone by the time the body was discovered. It just made things easier that way and the month spent at sea had been invaluable for any pirate-impersonating needs he would have in the future as well as for learning all the details of this ship so that he could commit a flawlessly planned assassination.

The only thing that worried him was Isabela. She had proven a fun and engaging companion both in bed and out of it and had, truth be told, reminded him a little of his fellow assassin, Rinna. She was using him, of course, but there was a slight difference between using someone for sex and amusement and using someone to get closer to and murder their husband. Still, it had to be done and it wasn't like she wouldn't okay. Girls like Isabela always landed on their feet and she was quite vocal on her distaste for her husband anyway.

He crept into Omer's room. Isabela slept in separate quarters which just further showed that husband and wife were not particularly close. He made no noise as he crossed the room and stood near Omer's bed. Zevran carefully removed the pillow from underneath Omer's head and pressed it over his face. Smothering was so inelegant but it would get the job and done, if someone had discovered the body before he could make his escape, it would not be immediately clear that it was murder.

Omer did not awaken at first but once he did he tensed, panicking at his inability to breathe. Zevran doubted that he realized what was going on at first but he quickly began to thrash around trying to free himself. In response, Zevran pushed down on the pillow harder. Suffocation wasn't a pleasant way to die but in a few minutes it would all be over.

Although it seemed like much longer to Zevran, the five to seven minutes it took for a human to suffocate eventually passed and Omer stopped moving. Zevran replaced the pillow and did a quick scan of the scene to see if he'd left any traces of his presence. He hadn't.

He creaked open the door to the cabin and peered outside. He didn't see anybody so chances were that there was nobody to see him sneaking out of Omer's quarters. He slipped out the door and hurried away from the room. He didn't see anybody which likely meant that he had gotten away with it.

On his way to his own bed, however, he encountered the lovely Isabela leaning against the railing of the ship and staring out at the ocean, her hair glowing in the moonlight.

"Can't sleep?" Zevran asked, coming to stand beside her.

Isabela turned to look at him. "You're leaving tomorrow." It wasn't a question.

Zevran nodded. "I do need to get back."

Isabela smiled at him. "We had fun."

"That we most certainly did," Zevran agreed with a smirk.

"We may not have tomorrow but there is still tonight," Isabela said suggestively. "And let me tell you, I am _notorious_ for long goodbyes…"

"Well, when you put it that way then who am I to deny such a beautiful woman?" Zevran asked rhetorically as he allowed himself to be led to Isabela's quarters.

Yes, all things considered he had enjoyed his time as a pirate.

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